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Submitted by: Anthony Malibu
After a breakup, it’s never easy to know how to communicate with your ex. Do you break ties completely, or do you try to stay in touch? And is emailing an ex boyfriend an acceptable method of communication, or should you avoid it?
Any time a relationship ends before you want it to, you’ll entertain thoughts of getting your boyfriend back. Learning the right and wrong ways to reverse a break up involves different levels of communication, and in today’s world, email is one of the basic ways of keeping in touch with your ex.
If you’re looking to win back your ex boyfriend, email can be both a blessing and a curse. While it may seem simple and innocent, there are pitfalls associated with emailing an ex that can hurt your chances of getting him back. At the same time however, it can also be used to re-open the lines of communication once they’ve been shut down.
Rule #1: Don’t Email Your Ex Boyfriend Until He Emails You
Thinking of sending him an email? Think carefully. The question as to whether or not you should email an ex boyfriend depends upon how long it’s been since the breakup, and what methods he’s used to get back in touch with you. If your relationship just ended and you’re trying to reach out to him this way, turning off your computer and NOT emailing your ex is always the right move.
Sending an e-mail to your ex boyfriend after he broke up with you is like admitting defeat. He’ll instantly see you as desperate, and know you don’t have the courage to call or face him. This puts you in a meek position of disadvantage from which it’s hard to regain control.
Rule #2: Don’t Answer His Emails Immediately
Now if your ex boyfriend has initiated contact by emailing you, you’ve got a variety of options. First and foremost, you don’t want to seem needy by answering his email right away. Even if he has a trace telling him when you opened his letter, NOT responding immediately can go a long way toward getting your ex interested again.
If it’s been less than two weeks since you broke up? Don’t even answer at all. Let your ex boyfriend’s email sit in your inbox unread, unanswered, and unconsidered. This tells your ex that either you’re too busy to write him back, or you’ve got better things to do. Putting yourself in the driver’s seat is a powerful way of regaining your ex boyfriend’s respect and desire.
Rule #3: No More Than Two Emails a Day
It’s very easy to get carried away with emailing your ex boyfriend. Conversations can go back and forth for hours, leaving much room for misinterpretation on either side. Instead, try to limit your emails to two or three a day, tops. Again, this conveys the message that you’ve got other things to do rather that chit-chat with your ex on the computer.
Getting your boyfriend back is all about creating a void in his life where you used to be. If you’re constantly emailing or text-messaging your ex, he never feels that void. Only when you can take yourself away – and out of his life – will your exboyfriend finally start to miss you. Missing you can very quickly turn into needing you, and this is what will put you back together.
Rule #4: Don’t Talk About Anything Heavy Through Email – EVER
If you’re trying to win your ex’s heart again, you’ll need to do it face to face. Nobody gets back together over the phone or through email, they always meet up at a point where the desire to see each other becomes overwhelming.
For this reason, avoid any heavy subjects while emailing back and forth with your ex. Don’t talk about the break up, and try not to pry into his social life. Casually talking about work, family, and other everyday things should give you a pretty good vibe as to how he’s feeling toward you. If he wants to take it a step further and discuss something with a little more gravity, ask him to meet up for lunch. Your communication is probably at the stage where you’d both benefit from seeing each other’s faces again.
So should you email an ex boyfriend? Only if you know what you’re doing. Getting back with an ex requires a level head and a step by step plan. Trying to do things on the fly will usually trip you up, but mapping out a blueprint for success can really increase the chances of being back together again.
About the Author: There are 8 Individual Steps that will help you in
Winning Your Boyfriend Back
, so find out what they are! Only by being proactive about your breakup can you one day hope to
get him back
.
Source:
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